A Year in Moments

(A year in moments)

As every year is this one has been filled with wild places and moments.. adventures and quiets spaces.. children becoming adults, the loss of my grandmother, and the reality that my parents are not immortal.  I took up mountain biking, took a new job, discovered more about myself and my needs, and learned to set boundaries and expectations as I move through this profound opportunity called living.  I crawled my way out of a deep depression day by day with the help of my husband and my family.  Thankfully, I feel more whole than I have in years. I let go of being for anyone else other than myself and found deep connection to life in loneliness and silence. I see the seasons echo themselves in my life, my love, and the way my needs speak to me.  I feel a passion for the creativity and self I laid down to fufill the expectations others had of me.  I am not looking forward to 2018 with intentions, resolutions, or desires. I am content to let things continue to unfold as it does.. Now is all I have... Moments, Family, and endless love.. That’s enough for me. 

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Christmas Cactus

This is our first Christmas without my grandmother here in physical form and we miss her. But, her beauty lives on in her Christmas Cactus which is covered in blooms bringing color and life to this season of new family traditions.  I also have her favorite amaryllis about to bloom on my dining room table. What a lifetime gift of the love of growing things both of my grandmothers bestowed upon me. 

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Return

The light begins to return today. The season of the dormant seed.. potential and hope. This is my favorite season.. this part of the life cycle.. for the promise of life being held within the shell deep of the seed in the ground as the visions that come after the harvest now must lie in wait.. and, for the potential of each seed.. between now and the great turning in early February when the light shifts to a sweet pastel yellow is the time to consider the seeds to be planted the coming cycle. As a tender of plants and soil and other living things this metaphor for this season speaks to me. What seeds will you plant this year?

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Contemplation

I have sat in this spot on this river for 20 years. I never tire of it or wish I was somewhere else when I am here.  When I visit this spot something inside me remembers, wakes up, and feelings flow like the water that is held between the banks. This is a place I call home. A place where my heart melts and my mind calms.. 

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Cloudy

... with a chance of rain ...

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