My Friend the River

For most of my adult life I have been in conversation with this river.  She has flowed within the cells of my being long before then.  You see, my grandmother had picnics here when she was a girl and my father used to come fish on the shoals long before I was even a thought carried in the winds of time.  

This river calls to me.  She invites me to her waters in my thoughts and in my dreams.  She has done this since we first met in physical form when I was just a young mother - a budding adult.  Even then the stories she wove for me offered me guidance, though my listening heart could only hear bits of pieces of her wisdom then.

Over the years of my adulthood I have visited her often.  Each time I visit with her she shares with me tales of impermanence, of flow, of light and of darkness.  I love her more with each visit.

Sometimes I sit upon her shores.  Sometimes I sit on the rocks that stand above her waters where she roars fiercely. Sometimes I bathe where bubbles of air drift over her reflective surface effortlessly.  I watch her powerfully run over the rocks slowly wearing away the stories they hold of yesterday.  In some places she runs spread out from shore to shore in her wide expanse flowing slowly and easily - here she whispers tales of expansiveness.  

This elder whose very molecules come from here and from there and everywhere willingly shares the myths of all the lives and all the worlds she has seen and held.  

This river has shaped me like she shapes the shores to which she is bound.  She has sat with me, witnessed me, and journeyed with me through this life thus far in all my emotions and in loving ceremony.

She is my ancestor, my elder, my sister, my friend.

Portal

I am grateful for the reflection and absorption of the sunshine that leads to the spectrum of color in the fall.  Each leaf has its own story to tell.  Each leaf drops to the ground in its own way.  Releasing the season of growth leading us towards the still and quiet winter.  Migrants are flying over and through seeking warmth closer to the equator.  A Pee Wee is making an appearance today.  Hawks are on the hunt for the busy world of movement in preparation for the winter that will come.  The birds are done recovering from the birthing season, they have joined their guilds and are prepping for the winter.  The squirrels are busy eating all of our pecans - though they plant as many as they eat. 

This morning, as these words fall out of my heart I can feel winter in the breeze that is passing over my fingertips and I long for the cold dark winter.  The stillness and the stars.  The trees above me rain leaves of yellows and reds and browns.  A hawk glides easily on the warm thermals of air far above the trees.  A crow chases her unwilling to share this space with her.  The hawk is relatively unfazed by the annoyance of this single crow.

I wondered recently what the job of the crows are.  They seem to be everywhere and there seems to be more of them than other birds.  How do they fit into the story here in my neighborhood?  They aren't songbirds and they aren't predator birds..  I wonder whether it is because they work to keep the hawks out of the neighborhood?  Maybe the crows keep the neighborhood safe in the late fall and winter so the other birds just work around them.  Are they tolerated nest robbers?  Maybe they are the mobsters of the neighborhood, but they provide a service that the rest of the birds need to survive the winter? My mind just exploded and another layer of the story reveals itself.

Cold

I found this bumblebee on our back porch this morning. It was so cold it seemed dead until I picked it up and realized it was still very much alive. I brought it inside in the palm of my hand and warmed it up. It was just beginning to buzz again when I took it back outside to this zinnia. I figured even if today was its last day it would be happier leaving its body behind on a beautiful flower over a dark corner on the back porch. When I checked later to see if it was still there it had flown off. I did check around to see if it had just fallen off the flower and it was no where to be found. Maybe today wasn't its last day.

At The Top

Eating the seeds of the Mexican sunflower.. thinking nobodies watching.. I was..

Look how it is holding on to the stem with its back feet.